yup. there's one which will hopefully be on the way (this time.) I'd pretty much known since Christmas but hoped I could keep it under wraps at least until we could clear the 3-month mark...unfortunately, my tummy has a mind of its own and pratically grew overnight. Now, I'm nearly 2 months and right at the height of the ever worsening sickness and all those things that come with pregnancy.

How difficult have things been? Oy. Let me tell you.

1. I feel so slow and stupid. it's like my capability for processing things went on hiatus. I feel so tired all the time that the simplest things like taking a shower just bushes me out. Unfortunately, tired as I may be, I have so much difficulty getting to sleep. And when I do get to sleep, the slightest sounds just wake me up!

2. I can't eat a damn thing. Would you believe I actually lost 3 pounds in two weeks? I just have no appetite, I could go for a whole day without eating with hunger just coming in briefly (like for 10 minutes) by night time. Even my favorite foods taste different, heck, they taste awful now! 

3. Sure, the boobs are nice and big but boy do they hurt!

4. Hubby and I came in just a few minutes ago (its 2:59 am now) after fruitlessly searching for guyabano and special mami.  Take note, i do not want any mami from Chowking or places like that. I want real estero type mami whose broth has been boiled for the longest time. (You have to admit they have a unique taste of their own...must be the vendor's hands putting the noodles in or something). I told hubby dear to look for a place where there were taxis and jeepneys parked in front. C'mon you can't have a better testament for good food in the middle of the night than hungry PUV drivers right?

Failing parked taxis, I told hubby to look for a place where most of its patrons had open-to- their-bulging- waists polo shirts, white sandos and a good morning towel slung on their shoulders who sat with both butt cheeks owning their chairs...drivers and cops off duty  

I MUST have guyabano tomorrow. Just thinking of the damn thing makes me salivate so!

5. I can't stand the smell of frying oil, frying garlic, heck, anything fried. It just makes me gag.

6. This is going to sound so weird but just the sight of fried or roasted chicken makes me throw up. The other night Nona and I ordered some food from McDo. The minute she opened her 1-pc chicken meal, i just had to throw up. If that isn't weird enough, bright signages sporting a red-orange color (like the Shanghai cafe in Timog) makes me hurl., Geez, how weird is that?! It's a freaking signage!

That's not all, when we had Mc Do takeouts, i actually felt hungry so I ordered a double cheeseburger, large fries, a hot fudge sundae and apple pie...the only things I was able to eat were the fries and the sundae. The cheeseburger tasted so weird like it was uncooked or old meat (hubby found nothing wrong with it) and the apple pie's smell just sent me rushing to the toilet

7. This week I graduated from just gagging and nausea to actually throwing up. Unfortunately since I haven't been able to eat much (if any) I end up spewing bile (sorry if too much info). The only thing that's keeping me going is how my girl Jen (who's now my OB) says it's a good indication of rising HCG levels. My problem is that such things are compounded by hyperacidity(like there's a burning hole in my tummy) and cramping due to gall stones getting stuck in a duct somewhere. Last year I had to go into the ER twice in one week coz of severe "God-kill-me-now" pain due to these dang stones.

8. My skin is sooo bad. It's hormones I tell ya.

9. Oh yeah, due to rising hormone levels, my temper and tolerance levels are also extremely bad...a fact my now often beaten up husband can attest to.It's a wonder he hasn't yet filed for spousal battery Does pregnancy develop a mild case of Tourette's syndrome? I swear all diplomacy and verbal self-censorship has flown with the wind.

I know how most people say that when your bundle of joy comes all these hardships will be worth it...sure I bet I'll feel that WHEN (and if) the little bundle comes but it's kinda hard to remember that while everything makes you feel sick in more ways than one and you feel like you're no longer throwing up just bile but probably most of your stomach acids.

I am so afraid. Remember we lost the baby last year at 11 weeks? Things seemed fine until just one drop of brown blood followed by an ultrasound that revealed a baby with no heartbeat. I am so hoping that that won't be the case this time.

I suppose it's actually a good thing that I have no time to think about this too much as I am so busy throwing up (whoever called it "morning sickness" is crazy. it should be the "24/7 sickness") and feeling all sorts of sick and horrible these days. What I am experiencing now is way more difficult and complicated than what I had in the 11 weeks prior to my miscarriage last year.

So far, we seem to be doing okay though. My ultrasound yesterday revealed a good growth/development from the Utz two weeks ago. The baby now has a heartbeat of 157bpm (I've been told that's pretty strong), gestational diabetes has at last been discounted (the OGTT was torture I tell you! I was on fasting for 12 freaking hours and had nothing other than glucose (100mg) dissolved in a glass of warm water!!! It was AWFUL) and my thyroid condition seems to have improved greatly.

Crazy, nauseous and anxious times...I've been told if I'm lucky the sickness will subside by the second trimester.

However, by experience over the years, I have this sneaking feeling that I was born under an unlucky start and will probably be numbered among those few women who suffer nausea throughout their entire pregnancy. With Nona I was throwing up well into my 7th month! Also, my pregnancy with nona was during one of the hottest summers as brought about by El Nino.

Hell, I always had two tubes of ice in bath water then just to cope with the heat...for this year, NBC nightly news says that this year's summer will be numbered among the hottest summers due to the current climate issues...just my luck *sigh*

 

 

 

Congratulations! I hope things start to go a little more smoothly for you soon, but still--CONGRATULATIONS!

Thank you :)

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